Have A Good Laugh~ ;)

I was googling for inspiring quotes and stumbled upon this hilarious website. They may be inspiring but.. hmm....I wouldn't take them too seriously. Time for some laughs!

''Marriage is the only war where you sleep with the enemy.'' -Gary Busey

''Always get married early in the morning. That way, if it doesn't work out, you haven't wasted a whole day.'' -Mickey Rooney

''The most dangerous food is wedding cake.'' -American Proverb

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''Don't marry for money; you can borrow it cheaper.'' -Scottish Proverb

''I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years.'' -Sam Kinison

''When a newly married couple smiles, everyone knows why. When a ten-year married couple smiles, everyone wonders why.'' -Author Unknown

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''Marriage is really tough because you have to deal with feelings... and lawyers.'' -Richard Pryor

''The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.'' -Henny Youngman

''Marriage is like a bank account. You put it in, you take it out, you lose interest.'' -Irwin Corey

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''I believe in tying the marriage knot, as long as it's around the woman's neck'' -W. C. Fields

''I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.'' -Groucho Marx

''The woman cries before the wedding and the man after.'' -Polish Proverb

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''Many a man owes his success to his first wife and his second wife to his success.'' -Jim Backus

''Marriages are made in heaven. But, remember, so are thunder and lightning.'' Author Unknown

''If love is the answer, could you rephrase the question?'' -Lily Tomlin

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''If it weren't for marriage, men would spend their lives thinking they had no faults at all.'' -Author Unknown

''We had a lot in common. I loved him and he loved him.'' -Shelley Winters

''There is so little difference between husbands, you might as well keep the first.'' -Adela Rogers St. Johns

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''Wedding rings: the world's smallest handcuffs.'' -Author Unknown

''In my house I'm the boss, my wife is just the decision maker.'' -Woody Allen

''I never married because I have three pets at home that answer the same purpose as a husband. I have a dog that growls every morning, a parrot that swears all afternoon and a cat that comes home late at night.'' -Marie Corelli

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''My wife tells me she doesn't care what I do when I'm away, as long as I'm not enjoying it.'' -Lee Trevino

''By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you'll become happy; if you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.'' -Socrates

''Laugh and the world laughs with you. Snore and you sleep alone.'' -Anthony Burgess

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''If you want to read about love and marriage, you've got to buy two separate books.'' -Alan King

''My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.'' -Rodney Dangerfield

''The best way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once.'' -H.V. Prochnow

''I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste.'' -David Bissonette

And my favourite....

''A husband's last words should always be, OK buy it.'' -Author Unknown